My boyfriend is a pervert

Ladies and gentlemen, let me tell you about my boyfriend. He's a real piece of work, and by that, I mean he's a certified pervert. I'm talking about a guy who thinks Victoria's Secret catalogs are high literature. The other day, I caught him ogling a mannequin at the mall. A mannequin! I swear, if I didn't know better, I'd think he was raised by a pack of horny wolves. But here's the kicker: he has the audacity to act all innocent when I call him out. "What? I was just admiring the craftsmanship!" Yeah, right. The only thing he's crafting is a one-way ticket to Creepville, population: him.

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